we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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