so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Randomize
