You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
