at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
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