I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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