Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
is wine microwaveable?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Randomize
