no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Randomize
