its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Randomize
