He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
