So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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