Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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