Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
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