i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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