so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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