Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
I AM VODKA MAN
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
