I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
