I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
