Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Randomize
