YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
