dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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