You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
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