he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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