the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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