I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
