playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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