Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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