I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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