My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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