I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
