Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
