god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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