no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
