I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Are my feet made of real feet?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
