scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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