Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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