So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
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