Is it normal to miss your booty call?
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
