just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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