so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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