Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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