the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
