Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
