Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
What a dumb baby whore.
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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