I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
