I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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