No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
