before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
