Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Randomize
