She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
