and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
